Saturday, November 23, 2019

Warming up for the main event

Vegas must be home to some of the shittest drug dealers on the planet. Are they really just standing there offering up their wares to every passerby? If they are then how the fuck are they not all in jail? I was offered drugs, again more than once and again before midday.

On Saturday I decided to play at the Orleans (thanks to those who advised me on Twitter) - I've never played there before but I fancied a change of venue so at 9.30 I headed out, through the MGM and across the Strip for the 2 or so mile walk down Tropicana to the Orleans. As it's so early there aren't many people about so I'm making a decent pace rather than having to swerve round tourists gazing inanely at stuff as if they've never seen any fancy lights before.

Before I've even walked 1/2 way there I'm offered drugs twice - do I really look like I want to buy drugs at 9.30am? I'm also walking at a decent pace (my friends call me the snow plough as I walk quickly and all they have to do is walk directly behind me and I've generally cleared a path through any crowd).

I could sort of understand their rationale of offering me drugs if I look dishevelled but I'm clean shaven and have fresh clothes on. They really must just hope that by offering to everyone they'll eventually make a sale. Or get arrested. Or is this a ruse to get people to stop then 3 burly guys (or I suppose as we're in the land of the free, 1 scrawny guy exercising his 2nd Amendment rights) jump out and mug the mark? Either way I barely break stride anymore when anyone off Strip approaches me.

Having stopped for coffee and breakfast along the way I arrive at the Orleans at 10.30ish - very nice poker room and I'm surprised how big it is. A beer is scooped during the first orbit and I settle down for a few hours of poker. Shit cards and missed draws meant I only lasted a couple of hours but I've been topping up my beer levels which has kept me interested. So about 2pm I head back over to the Strip, in a cab this time as I can't be bothered to walk. The day is still young but I'm not sure how much poker I want to play. Maybe a few beers can make my mind up so I head to the Linq which has a decent bar serving a multitude of weird and wonderful beers.

I sat there for an hour or so and watched some of the college football which I rarely do - although I'm a fan of the NFL I find the American fascination with college sports a bit weird. I can understand supporting a team that's local to you or where you studied but supporting a team from halfway across the country is just odd. But that might be just me being British as there's not really a culture of college sports in the U.K. - the only famous one being the university boat race but the same two teams make the final every year.

So anyway - after a few beers I decided I did, in fact, want to play some more poker. So off down the Strip to PH I went to enter their 4pm tournament which I'd cashed in last Friday.

No such luck today and I'm out inside an hour so I sit down for another unremarkable cash game. Have they started putting downers in the free drinks or something? Where have all the crazies gone? This is the 3rd time I've had a less than exciting time here in the last 2 weeks but at least the waitress service is good and it's 8pm before I realise that I haven't eaten since before arriving at the Orleans this morning.

Back to the MGM I head for something to eat at Emeril's fish restaurant - very decent food and a couple of glasses of a very nice Chardonnay set me up well for another session of poker, but little was I to know that the whole day had just been a warm up for the main event. And this time the craziest of all the crazies was at the MGM rather than at PH - which I'll tell you about in my next entry.

Total beers consumed (pre poker session) - 12 bottles

Running total - 119.5 bottles (41.8kg / 92 pounds). I'm over 50% of the way to my target!!


  1. Nobody ever offers to sell me drugs. I must look like a boy scout.

    1. You should be grateful - I’m starting to get worried now that my Vegas life leaves me looking like I’m either on drugs or searching for them

    2. Not sure what is more annoying, the guys with the baseball-size cards for strip clubs/escorts or the guys offering drugs.

    3. I think it’s the card people - they just end up getting thrown on the street and I hate littering